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Negotiation is finding the best solution to a certain problem or situation. So whether it is in the boardroom or bedroom, courtroom or living room, we all face situations where we have to negotiate about something. Negotiation may involve two or more people. The process entails putting all options on the table and finally coming up with an answer.

What makes negotiations challenging is when the other person or persons have totally opposing views from yours. Another factor that makes negotiations quite difficult is when both or all options are good, but then you have to come up with only one solution.

Success in negotiation is not only getting your “preferred decision” approved but keeping everybody on the negotiation table at peace with your preference.

With these in mind, here now are the steps to successful negotiations. These steps can be applied to personal negotiations (spouse, children, family members, friends), corporate negotiations (board members, staff, leaders, union, congregation), or sales negotiations (whether one-on-one or group).

1. Understand where each person on the negotiation table is coming from.

This can be done by doing your research. Find out everything you can about them and how they feel about certain situations, then, incorporate all these in what you will present during the negotiation.

2. Study and understand what the bottom-line is: What is the main problem? What needs to be achieved?

The success of negotiation lies more in the pre-negotiation phase than the actual negotiation. If you do your homework well, chances are you will have a good presentation. Study all angles and be sure to cover all these.

3. Plan your presentation or talk based on the information you gathered.

The person or persons you are negotiating with should not feel threatened by your preference. Instead, they should see you as an ally more than an opponent.

4. When presenting your side, let everyone know that you are there with everybody’s best interest in mind.

You have to let them know that you did your research and that you know what each one’s concerns are. Tell them that all these concerns are incorporated in what you are going to present.

5. Be ready for feedback, reactions, and oppositions.

Before you present, let the people on the negotiation table know that you will only entertain questions or reactions after you finish presenting your side. Be very objective and avoid being emotional when you are dealing with oppositions. Always let the opposing party know that you understand where she is coming from.

6. Be open for some changes or modifications of your views and preferences.

Be willing to listen to their views and make the necessary adjustments.

7. Find a common ground.

Look for a common denominator that everyone can agree to.

If you are a Christian, be careful not to put yourself in situations where you have to compromise your belief or the Word of God. Don’t even get into any partnerships or business deals with those who are not fellow believers or those who will not use God’s Word as the ultimate standard.

In the feature film RV, Robin Williams plays an advertising executive. His boss orders him around and it looks like Robin will be put out to pasture. Showing no respect to Robin, the boss orders him onto an assignment. To make a presentation in Colorado, Robin must cancel his family’s vacation plans. Hawaii is out. An RV trip to the mountains is in. He is ashamed to admit to his wife and kids that the trip is anything but an attempt to reestablish some quality time in a family that has become fragmented.

Robin stays up at night writing the presentation and fires it off from a mountain peak when he is able to find a signal strong enough. He abandons his family to make the presentation and only then finds out that his boss has brought along a replacement for Robin. Robin is only a backup. The first-string guy fumbles and Robin must step in.

After meeting the clients and noticing their reactions to the first-string guy’s emphasis on profits and money, Robin takes a different tact and talks about nostalgia, love and the environment. He saves the day, and the account.

Whenever I have to make a presentation, I always leave myself some wiggle room. I’ll switch horses in mid-stream if I have to . . . and sometimes I even plan it that way.

Recently, I was to review a fund-raising video with a client. I played the rough draft version of the video they had approved. They were happy. They loved it. I could have walked away and finished the production, but instead I said, “But, that’s not the video I recommend for your fundraising event.” In editing, I had fallen in love with a single interview. I was unable to use any “soundbites” from that interview for the approved video, but with a few simple edits, I was able to use the interview itself as a heartfelt fundraising presentation. There was not a dry eye in the conference room after I played the video.

I was confident with both videos, but if the client had hated the first video, I would have redeemed myself with the second. The client loved them both. The interview video was played at the big fundraising event and they were both distributed on DVD and placed on the web. My budget was increased slightly and the client was extremely pleased with their two fundraising videos.

When making presentations, you must know your clients, you must listen to your clients and by all means you must watch your clients during the presentation. If you need to make adjustments, don’t make them lightly. But if you sense that something else is needed to make the client happy, stay loose and try a little adjustment.